Monday, May 23, 2011



Ayo, you can’t win for me
I’m sitting at my work bench and preparing to type away. It’s been a busy week. Okay busy, I’m kind of scared of that word. It’s the word that makes me shorten conversation time on my favourite couch with the divine. I mean it’s a privilege beyond words to have access to dialogue with the one who carved Mount Everest with his words and here I am at times saying ‘. . .Okay sweet Lord, I love with all my heart and you know that but I’m almost late for work. . . .’ I blow a kiss and rush out of the ‘dwelling place’.

On the contemplative and reflective, how pathetic I can be. I want to do so much for God but I just don’t wait enough to know what he wants done.

I want to run for God but at the moment He is walking through the slums in my neighbourhood touching the broken

I want to fly for God but the ones in need of his touch through me are where arms don’t reach the sky

I want to win for God but he’s chasing after me wanting to tell me ‘rest
Yes rest child, I already won’

The ache we go through is because we do not ‘know’ the provisions of the Father who gave it all for us

The pain, though it might teach us to be more alert to him is because we do not have an understanding of the pain he paid at Calvary
I hear you say ‘tell us . . . tell us what you know’
Oh I’m learning too.
It’s an experience so you have to dive in to learn too
Some things I’m sure of
‘Calvary’ is more than words on a paper
Redemption is more than a story to tell
And grace is an experience of which if we had a taste of, it could make us race the world.
There’s a path of intimacy carved out by our spiritual fathers. We forget we can’t slay Goliath without spending time in the fields to ‘hear’ it’s five and not three stones we are meant to pick. We forget we can’t birth a nation without entering into ‘covenant’ friendship with the Divine just like Abraham, and that we can’t bear our cross with so much poise and joy without ‘setting out before dawn’ to find a place of solitude just like our Lord Jesus.
It’s sad that if the king of kings who measures the whole universe with the span of his hands has called us all to a ‘feast’ but few choose to come. Love honours invitations it doesn’t just blow kisses. Love makes out time for a time to commune.

Ayo, you can’t win for me; I’ve already won

But how Lord? I can’t win for you! But I need to . . .  I need to. The kids are dying in Somalia. There’s war in some parts in Sudan. Women are being trafficked year round via the coast of Greece. I have to win. . . I have to win for you in these places.
You have to ‘know’ I’ve already won to experience victory in the things you want to win in

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