Privilege

[Image by cubagallery]

I tip toe into the T.V. room

‘Will He come today?’ is the question that hits hard at my heart

A sense of confusion awakens me from the hands of the night and pulls me in still

So what am I to do?

I have come

I find my place on an empty side and seat still

My mind is sour

I want my bed

I doze a bit

I snooze for a while

My attention thaws

My mind wanders

And it’s then I remind myself I’m not an alarm

Why should I snooze in the first place?

And it’s then I am alarmed!

Alarmed by the truth that it’s a privilege

It dawns on me twenty five minutes into the ordeal that he’s been waiting for me long before I came.

And I came 15 minutes late

Actually I woke up 5 minutes late

I struggled with the inevitable hand that invites us to nature’s rest for the next 10

And finally I threw back the duvet, found my bedroom slippers and walked over like a knackered fresh army intake invited for his first drill

This is not a drill, I have to remind myself

It’s a privilege

An invitation to meet with the King of all the richest kings of the earth and more is a privilege.

I wouldn’t mind a morning with the Sultan of Brunei

In fact a couple of mornings

Guilt flushes my face as I think on that

When the Divine invites me on mornings and I feel jaded about it ; I need to see

Maybe I’m blind to who he is

He is God

The sultan would one day pass and shouldn’t be compared to the One whom he will one day answer to

Last time I heard

He’s bigger than this room

He’s bigger than this earth

He’s finger span is bigger than entire universe

 And last time I checked

He’s been waiting for me long before I came in 20 minutes late

And I’m wondering

How does a big God fits himself into my ‘tiny’ TV room to talk to little me?

Stepping Out:

The Christian is peculiar. He has a God that wants to meet with him or her, A God that wants intimacy and wants to know the individual personally, the real God. But most have made him into a ‘Sunday’ God, a God who is lofty and doesn’t indulge or isn’t concerned with our affairs. Or like the character in the verse above, some see relating to him as a duty.

But seriously, I beg to differ. . .

There can be expressions. There can be a dance. There can be a song of love. He can be a best friend and I’m learning that too. But wait. . . Like all relationships, our relationship with the Divine requires time, openness and some other things we overlook. And it's important to note that quantity does not equal quality but quality has to be consistent to retain quality.

So what can you do today to increase the quality of your time with God? Who knows you might just be starting out or you might have stopped overtime due to not ‘meeting him there’. I want to encourage you, it’s not too late. God would redeem the lost time and draw you close. So back to the question: what can you do today to increase the quality of your time with God?

It might be simple as resetting your alarm wake-up time.

Till Next time

U R LUVED



[How to] Run The World [Not Just Girls. . . Boys too]

[Image by  Libertad Leal ]

I just made a discovery right here at the corner of my room

I am not the center of my world

For a long time, I was the lead vocalist of my band

And God was a drummer

Sometimes he did the background vocals

From time to time, I will take center stage and we will do a few gigs

"God is playing on my show" i will always tell the invited guests in a frenzy, doing some rock moves to affirm I was cool

They always left the show with a look on their faces

The type you have when you have just seen the grossest scene from a horror movie, say Saw IV

"it's just a show" I would say laughing out loud

"God played. Didn't you enjoy Him?"

But we all knew the truth

I played and no one enjoyed me

It's funny how we want to do so much for God and we never let him sing the lead vocals in our lives

I am standing right here at this corner and all my band members are gone

The instruments are broken and all I'm left with : a haunting dream to run the world

God never left

No he didn't 

And God never did the BGVs

The god that we like to follow our every command is an idol

Taking the parts of God we are comfortable with and juxtaposing it with a new idea of what we think He should be equals an Idol

Finally, it good to know I can't re-invent God

God isn't a drummer 

And if He decides to drum; I better dance to his tune

So how do I run the world when all the members of my band have left

So how do I get to fulfill purpose with superstar written all over it

I better join His band

I better join the band of the one who already runs the world

Stepping out:

"your idols will break your heart"

We all love and want to do something BIG

This motivation and dream has lead a lot of people down the wide road of 'self destruction'

Do you think God is interested in You doing something BIG? Oh yes he is. A verse in the book of Ephesians talks about how we are his fine work of art which he wants to display for the whole world to see. But it's interesting how we want to 'lead' this God who knows the end from the beginning. In what ways are you finding yourself leading where you need to be led? In what ways are you taking center stage when you need to be playing the BGVs. There's a place of sweet surrender. Join God's Band today. In fact it's as practical as being committed to a local church where you can bloom.

Till next time

U R LUVED

Book Club Thursday - The Sacred Romance

Our book for this edition of BCT is one I have read a couple of times. It’s a book called ‘Sacred Romance’ by John Eldredge and Brent Curtis (who is now late).
This book is an eye opener! I remember my first finishing of this book as I stood in an open field with the pages of the book open, I looked beyond the horizon, and I knew for sure, something in me had awaken to a reality beyond me. My world view was changed. How I saw occurrences and situations seemed so different. And most of all it was an invitation into a whole new life adventure.
I do really want to encourage us to make out time of our ‘busy’ schedule and pick up this book at a bookstore near us and do read it. It’s sure an eye opener. I am confident of saying that again. Till next time on BCT I would like to leave us with a quote by one of the authors of this book.

"You cannot be the man who rescues until you are the man who needs rescuing" – John Eldredge

Can I Listen To Your 'Art' ?

[Image by andreamoody ]

Can I listen to your heart?

Cause that’s all you’ve got

Can I listen to your heart?

In it is something unique

A story maybe

A song maybe

You’ve got a great voice

But can I listen to your heart still

You got an amazing persona

But can we get a glimpse of your heart

You’ve got a skilled public speaking style

But can I hear your heart beyond it all

In the heart live the treasures of darkness

Some hide their heart for the evil it might reveal

I say reveal your heart for the glory it might redeem

In the heart is something priceless

A gift for all men is kept in there by God

The unwise try to preserve the heart by keeping it locked up

But to reveal the heart is to preserve it

To reveal our hearts is to keep us going

I know a writer somewhere far away who keeps forging from her heart

It doesn’t bring the money

But somehow she isn’t going to leave the earth with what she was meant to give

when she leaves, she is a fulfilled being ready to rest

I know a superstar, maybe here, maybe there

Who keeps it all inside and sells all on the outside

The last I heard of her, she laid in a pool of her own blood

She sold her soul but never gave her heart

Can I listen to your heart?

You who sing beautiful songs with no beauty

And speak holy words in an unholy manner

In your heart is a gift

Cause when it comes from the heart there is a shift

Cause when we speak from the heart

Our words are worth more than works of art.

P.S. – For everyone who cages art in professionalism, it would do us good to ask ourselves from time to time ‘Where is the expression when it is caged?’

Stepping Out:

‘The creator and his work are one’

Are you are writer, singer, artist or someone involved in creative processes?

Do you see a part of you in your work?

Or better said does your work reflect what you believe?

When an artist doesn’t reflect his work it might point to some things much deeper. He is probably hiding behind his work. He is not comfortable with the story he has found himself in, so he seeks to paint a picture perfect story for a world that hungers for his own unique story.

In what ways can you communicate more from the heart through your art?

What chains are holding you down in doing this?

What are you doing about it?

"For art to speak, It must be from the heart."

The Day The Enemy Died [Fiction]

[Image by Johanne A. P. ]



Maybe today I would try to pick up my life again. . . . .

I punch the snooze button on my bedside alarm for the ninth time since the beginning of this new day. Simple math, I won’t be making the bus today. With a ten minutes interval between each snooze break, it should 8:00 a.m. I would just call in sick.

I can’t do this I simply can’t do. . . .

Rolling out of the duvet cover, I plant my feet into the plush carpet. Its pleasure is a pain. Papa. . .

Everything around here reminds me of him but I have chosen to be reminded though it’s been 10 years.

I’m losing it . . . I can’t do this. . . .

I make my way to the kitchen counter. I’m Cassie, I remind myself; Cassie Reynolds and no one is taking away that name from me. Not even the latter part.

I approach the coffee maker like it’s a sepulcher holding rotting bones. The mix of coffee and rotting bones don’t go so well somewhere in my mind. I rather stick with coffee this morn and leave rotting bones till later.

Who am I? I don’t even know me any more . . .

Everything seems to speak his name this morning. General Carlton John Reynold . . . . Carly. . .  Papa. I don’t want to remember. I don’t want to.

My name is Cassie Reynolds. I never knew my mum cause she died when I was 3. Her name was Reba. And my dad . . . please don’t let me remember. . .  He killed him.

My life stopped when my father died. I moved out of my student apartment in mid town Boston and moved back home here in Seattle. The wedding plan just became an ‘impossibility’. My dear Ferdinand, oh how I loved him and still love him. But the pain was just too much for me to share. You can’t share in a pain you know nothing about. I had to let him go. He just didn’t seem to understand. ‘move on and leave it behind” he kept chanting like a downtown preacher that just got on pulpit to do his Sunday morning limbo. “I would have to keep his name” I finally told him. He looked at me appalled on the last night we met “you are not ready to become one with me”. He walked away and I never saw him again. Naïve lover. .  Someday maybe he will understand the pain of losing all you once had. But oh Papa. The rain here reminds me of him, everything does. . . . Even the plush carpet.

I pick up the remote on the counter and turn on the TV. A mournful blues melody wafts through the air. . The singer looks as pale as she sounds.

“I will wait for you forever. You left with no goodbyes. . . . Can it begin again? Maybe this time you wouldn’t be gone before I turn”.

I’m tempted to turn it off. This pale star doesn’t know what she’s singing. Who paid her to look like a Dracula? I tune to another channel. I have tried my whole life since papa left to have it back where it started. I have wished I could go down with the plane that took his life. I asked a thousand times why the last conversation had to be an argument. I have prayed to God if he ever hears me to revenge those who took the only one I had left in a world of strangers. I have tried to have it back but still I’m stuck.

I’m stuck here . . .

I set the remote down and grab my mug of hot decaf. The headline on the news channel I just tuned to is an answer to the only prayer I have uttered all my life since they took my papa from me. Hot liquid spills on me as my mug clatters on the kitchen floor.

A picture of the murderer looms on the screen. I move close to the screen like I want to grab him and strangle him. I remind myself he is already dead. I crash to the floor as I scream the pain.

Am I crying over the death of the murderer?

Am I?

I should be throwing a party

But there’s no room for a party

My anger still looms in the emptiness of my soul even after the one I seek revenge for dies.

I have stabbed him in a thousand times in my heart for what he did.

But my enemy dies and it didn’t bring back Papa.

My enemy dies and I can’t even rejoice.

What brings Joy to a soul even after the enemy has ravaged unlawfully what is not for him to have?

I thought revenge would make me happy

It only made me remember how long ago happiness left my door

A long time ago

Questions for pondering and discussion

ü  How would you define Cassie, The main character in the story?

ü  Cassie Reynolds is a type A emotional woman some would say; but is she? What traits from the story point her to be the hard hearted woman she is?

ü  Cassie moves from Boston to Seattle after she lost her father, the only family she had known (at least according to the scope of the story) in the world known September 11 plane crash. Does this give her a reason to put her life on standstill?

ü  Cassie sees a popular musician singing a bluesy love song on the TV screen. How does her reaction to the scene display the cynicism that has cleaved to her in the aftermath of her father’s death?

ü  Referring to her fiancée Ferdinand, Cassie muses ‘You can’t share in a pain you know nothing about’. Do you believe this is true?

ü  Cassie muses at the beginning of the story “I’m Cassie . . . . .  Cassie Reynolds and no one is taking away that name from me. Not even the latter part.” What’s your view on women who choose to retain their maiden name even after marriage?

ü  Cassie muses after she hears about Osama Bin Laden’s death on the TV “I have stabbed him a thousand times in my heart for what he did”. What ways do you think the September 11 event forever changed the lives of those who lost loved ones in it?

ü   A thing line theme on revenge runs through the short story. What effects has holding to a grudge brought your way in the past?

#MusicMonday - He Can Fix it !

Hello friends. It’s the first edition of #MusicMonday and here is a playlist titled ‘He can fix !’. It’s a collection of 10 awesome songs centered on God being there to help us make it through.  Are you going through? You could use this. Are you on the mountain top and seeking for the next level of living in your life? You could use this too. You can click on the artist name to find more about the particular artist and you can click on the song name to get a youtube feel of the song. I hope you all enjoy it and have yourself a GREAT #MusicMonday J !

1. He Can Fix It by Shei Atkins from the album The Lita Mae Show

2. Forgiveness by Beckah Shae from the Album Life

3. Revealed by Mario Brown from the Album Glory

4. Change in the Making by Addison Road from the Album Stories

5. Stronger by Mandisa from the Album What if We Were Real

6. He wants it All by Forever Jones from the Album Get ready

7. Reason by Larue from the album Larue

8. Trainwreck by Mat Kearney from the album Bullet 

9. Your Love Never Fails by Jesus Culture from the album Your Love Never Fails

10. I Will Not Take My Love Away by Matt Wertz from the album Everything in Between

Enjoy!

It's The Middle of the Year and I Can't Find My Dreams !

[Image by goddess_spiral ]

I love a train on a track that keeps moving on no matter what comes in it way. It breaks down and something about it hopes for a repair to continue its journey. 

I love a seed that chooses to grow no matter the weather conditions. There’s a promise of a beautiful tree at the end of its road. No matter what comes it way it would choose to bloom wherever it planted.

I love a man whose hands keep giving though he hasn't received anything. Something sets him out of the crowd. He is not moved by the reality unfolding around him. He holds on to the promise- the key of the door to a greater reality.

If you started this year with a box of seeds, you tilled the soil, made everything ready and sowed faithfully but still somewhere at the middle, there’s nothing to show for it. You are empty and your box of seeds is gone.

Hold on . . . . This is for you          

If you started off with the momentum of a train. You were moving with so much vigor at the beginning but somewhere in the middle something went wrong. Your train on a track has become a train on a spot.

Hold on. . . . This is for you.

If you are the man who has chosen to follow the way, you have believed in the promise. You wrote the vision and made it plain. You made a decision to run with it but it seems everything is running against you and most of all, it’s running into the second half of the year

Hold on   . .... This is for you

Sometimes last week, I dug up my box of dreams; it was an old spiral journal. I opened it up and out came the dream. It was the plans and desires God placed in my heart sometimes last year for the year ahead. It was a sweet torture. The dates are already here and I haven’t seen the manifestation.

. . . .During the first year of his reign, I, Daniel, was studying the writings of the prophets. I learned from the word of the lord, as recorded by Jeremiah the prophet, that Jerusalem must lie desolate for seventy years. So I turned to the Lord God and pleaded with him in prayer and fasting. I wore rough sackcloth and sprinkled myself with ashes . . . . – Daniel 9:2-3

When it’s time to for the dream to become a reality and we see nothing, what do we do?

We go back to God, the giver and keeper of our dreams.

What has he said concerning you?

What have you seen concerning what he has said concerning you?

He is not man and he doesn't lie

And where are you now?

In your valley of complaints or rising on a mountain of praise

Stop the ‘if’s and ‘but’s

Quit the complaining and worrying and turn to the Lord.

So don’t get tired of doing what is good. Don’t get discouraged and give up, for we will reap a harvest of blessing at the appropriate time – Galatians 6: 9

Complain and remain. Praise and be raised – Joyce Meyer

STEPPING OUT:

We, humans really know how to keep it all inside and appear pretty outside. It’s the middle of the year. What is it that is restraining an abundance of joy in your heart at this point in time? What has God promised but you are yet to see at this time of the year? Bring it to God. God can sure handle your honesty.

Take some time and study Daniel’s experience in Daniel 9. Angel Gabriel shows up later in verse 22 as Daniel was praying saying “Daniel, I have come here to give you insight and understanding.. . “ what ways do you need to understand the plan, purposes and timing of God for your life better?

Angel Gabriel latter mentions “the moment you began praying, a command was given. I am here to tell you what it was, for God loves you very much. . . ”. In what ways do you think God is waiting on you? Oh yeah you read that right, waiting on you to act. Are there things he has put in your heart to do that you are ignoring? Have you ever considered it that God already answered your prayers concerning the year? 

“For God loves you very much.  . .” do you ever take time to consider the love God has for you and how he would not want to leave you to be shamed even before a world that keeps asking ‘Is your God for real?’

Take time to consider these things. Remember, it’s an experience not an experiment.

U R LUVED

Happy New month and welcome to the second half of the year 2011